First, the song:
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_songI...;songID=6860611
It might not be up your alley, admittingly the styling is a little different from my norm and I'm still trying to get used to it myself. My leads aren't that great, and neither is the solo, but at least I'm trying. It's not complete, there need to be mixing changes, and I need to find a keyboard to record with, mine's a piece of shit. I had to sequence the keys because my KB is so old it doesn't even have a line out. The part at the end with no drums will have drums, I just haven't come up with anything yet. I wrote lyrics too, I don't know if they're any good. I've never written lyrics before, so if they sound gay, oh well. They'll be growled btw.
QUOTEA short intro plays, and then comes the verse riff. After the verse riff plays once, comes this:
The day of reckoning has come,
Higher beings
will soon pass judgment,
There will be no peace or complacence,
We have lost sight of our innocence!
Obviously the chorus comes right after the verse is finished, where this is screamed:
Our days are numbered...
The sun doesn't rise,
We'll never move forward,
with death in our eyes.
The will to live,
has long since died.
The only hope for humanity...
is buried by it's pride.
A post chorus with lead guitars follows, no vocals. After this the verse riff plays once again, and then comes this:
Fallen from grace,
Corruption of the soul.
Now just a tool,
That's outlived it's purpose.
There's nothing left in this world that is for us,
In this land of ruin, what will we become?
I hope that gives a basic idea of where they will go, I know it's hard to figure out the rhythm just from that. I can growl decently enough, so I'd record the vocals if I could, but I don't have the equipment for that yet.
Yes? No? Maybe so? I don't even know what to think of this song, I don't write music like this most of the time.

It's a bit too metalcore for me, but to be honest it's really good

Hey, thats not bad. Not exactly my cup of tea, but that'd give some of the more prominent metalcore bands a run for their money.

Haha, I figured it wouldn't be you're kind of stuff. It's not even my kind of music, I just play whatever I play and that's what I play I usually have a slight metalcore kind of sound, but not like this, I've just been a lazy guitarist lately. I haven't practiced in god knows how long, I just play when I write. There was a time when I used to shred a little through some patterns, and now that I don't practice I can't even come close to the speed I used to have.
About a day after posting this song, I re-recorded everything, tweaked the drums, and did some EQing. Maybe the difference isn't that noticeable to some, but to me it is. I'm a stickler for sound, I know how I want it and if it's a little off I just can't leave it be. I think it sounds much better and I didn't play quite as sloppy on this take. Now I just have to finish the song, that shouldn't take long, it's practically done now.
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_songI...;songID=6872422

It does sound better, tonally. Good job.

Kudos man! It would remind me of a God Forbid song if it was beefed up a little bit hehe... Sounds good tho, keep it up!

What drum software are you using?

QUOTE(Elliot @ Sep 8 2008, 06:15 PM) [snapback]449023[/snapback]What drum software are you using?
Fruityloops with a mismatch collection of samples.

i like ur stuff i checked all ur stuff im a fan. i am a noob at drum tracks lol i would upload but just guitars would be boring

Sick. Especially loving the fast ATR-style bit.

Well I'm glad some people besides me like my shit. The stuff I have uploaded is only a small taste of what I have written and its not even the best stuff. I'm really kind of embarrassed by the recordings I've put up. I could do so much better. The tone sucks, the playing is sloppy, and the recordings just generally sound rough.
I'm getting a pod port for Christmas and I do my drums with superior drummer now. The new recordings will be much better.